12 Signs You Will Never Be Happy With Your Partner
One thing’s for certain: happiness is key to positive and healthy relationships. I mean, why would you even choose to pair off if the pairing makes you unhappy?
Well, loneliness, for one. Commitment, for another. Societal pressure, for a third. But common sense says you should never force a relationship that makes you unhappier than being alone.
But at the beginning of a relationship, how do you know whether a lifetime of happiness or misery is in store for you? One way is to watch for these 12 surefire signs you will never be happy with your partner.
- You Don’t Trust Them
Relationships are built on trust. If your partner seems untrustworthy whether you’ve caught them in the act or they just have a shady aura then you will always be suspicious. This may be paranoia on your part, but paranoia still impedes your happiness, so you must assess your trust issues before building a relationship.
- They Don’t Trust You
If the coin is flipped and you’re the one who isn’t trusted, this could lead to unhappiness as well. Your partner may claim you’re cheating, when you’re not; they may be extremely jealous, without cause. Again, trust is integral to a relationship, so if your partner doubts you, you’ll feel hurt by this distrust, particularly if you’ve done nothing wrong.
- You Don’t Like Each Other
Love, love, love. We always talk about relationships in terms of love. But, guess what? It’s just as important tolike the one you’re with. Liking your partner’s personality, sense of humor, and their general being is simply essential to relationship goals.
- You Don’t Have Anything in Common
While opposites do sometimes attract, it’s also necessary to have some common interests, common values, common personality traits, etc. If you don’t, then you’ll likely find that in short time, you’ll be living separate lives.
- You Don’t Respect Each Other
R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Aretha Franklin spelled it out for us, and it’s one of the pillars of a healthy partnership. If you don’t respect one another, then you will use and abuse each other. This is not happiness.
- You Avoid Them
Your partner texts you, and you ignore it. Your partner shows up at your door unexpectedly, and you pretend you’re not home. If you’d prefer time alone over being with your partner, then that’s a surefire sign you won’t be happy spending a lifetime with this person.
- You Fight Often
It’s normal and even sometimes healthy to fight in a relationship. Misunderstandings arise, and you must hash them out and move on. But if fighting is a regular thing, then this isn’t going to be a walk in the park, and you certainly won’t be skipping hand-in-hand.
- You Fight Mean
Even worse is if you cannot fight fair. While sometimes it’s difficult to be the moderator of a debate, while you’re debating, it’s important to keep a level head and not take cheap shots at your partner. If you frequently aim to hurt this person to their core, you probably don’t love them.
- You Can’t Forgive Them
Forgiving is as integral to relationships as fighting. Once you’ve hashed things out, pardoning each other’s faults is the obvious next step. A failure to forgive leads to pain and misery and a constant open wound.
- You Don’t Communicate
Communication is also one of the cornerstones to a strong partnership. If you can’t communicate with each other or if you refuse to then you’re not building a relationship; you’re destroying one.
- Nagging is Constant
While asking your partner to do something is a must in some cases, telling them to do it, over and over again, like a broken record, will leave your partner feeling irritable and will leave you feeling ignored.
- You Don’t Get Along with Your Partner’s Family
If your partner loves his/her family, then you must at least get along with them. Your partner shouldn’t have to play referee constantly, and you shouldn’t make him/her choose whose side to be on https://findrussianbrides.org/. If you do, discord will ensue.
While some people try to force a relationship that just isn’t working, regardless of the pitfalls they may face, it’s important that you get out early if you see a lifetime of misery looming ahead. Otherwise, you may find yourself the unhappiest you’ve ever been.
Think you know the rules to a healthy relationship? Maybe you do. But maybe you’re treating some rules as gospel. Try ignoring these 7 relationship rules and see if your partnership takes an upswing.
- Honesty is the Best Policy
For the most part this is true. But you can be TOO honest. You may hold certain opinions about her eccentric mother or her attractive friend that are best kept to yourself. Maybe it’s not necessarily dishonesty, but it is not complete honesty. You should be aware of how the things you say affect your partner. A good partner tries to say the right things at the right time instead of disclosing every little thing that’s on their mind.
- If Someone Wants You to Change Who You Are, They Don’t Love Who You Are
News Flash: You might have some qualities that aren’t exactly conducive to a healthy relationship. Perhaps you are a highly abrasive jerk or a social hermit. Don’t be afraid to try to change yourself if you think it will make you a better human being. You don’t have to jettison the parts of yourself that are fundamentally you (and you shouldn’t unless they suck). But your partner might be able to help you grow into a person that even you find more likeable.
- Never Go to Sleep Angry
It’s nice to try to swallow your anger before bedtime, but sometimes you just need to sleep it off and pick it up another day. There’s nothing wrong with letting a good night’s rest clear your head and possibly give you new insight on your partner’s point of view. Not to say you should leave an argument unresolved forever, but maybe you had a long day and your threshold for disagreement has bottomed out. It’s okay to give the argument and yourself a little break and try it again when you’re feeling refreshed.
- Split the Household Chores Evenly
You probably think you should split the bills evenly too. How very naïve of you. It’s good to try and keep things relatively fair, but in the real world nothing is ever split down the middle, and that’s okay. You don’t have to be a doormat and wait on your partner hand and foot. But, you also shouldn’t become consumed with keeping everything exactly square. The stress you feel typically comes from over thinking the balance between you and your partner. Give it a break and just enjoy the ride a bit.
- You’re Shallow If You Choose a Partner For Their Looks
All lasting relationships are built on an intimate connection that is deep and everlasting and blah blah blah. In reality, the first time you saw your partner, you probably weren’t thinking of the deep emotional journey you would embark upon. It’s okay that you’re a little shallow. Physical attraction is important, even if it’s not the total package. Your bodies should speak to each other just like your minds and your souls or whatever. So go ahead and check out your partner’s absolutely fine assets, guilt-free.
- A Happy Union Is a Bond Between Two Good Forgivers
Forgiveness is a wonderful gift, but sometimes it should be a ‘going away’ present. Yes, forgive your partner for the little things and even some of the big things, so long as you think it truly was a mistake and they’re sorry. Second chances can be a wonderful bonding experience. But if they’re a repeat offender and they’re just sorry they got caught, forgive them and then show them the door.
- If Your Family Hates Your Significant Other, It Might Be a Good Sign to Let Them Go
Yes, if your family dislikes your lover, it might make things a little tense. Maybe they dislike him/her for good reason. Respect their opinion, but give it some time. They might just need to warm up to them and find some common interests. Perhaps your past lovers have made your family a little wary of your choices (you sure know how to pick ’em). Or maybe your family is the problem. In any case, if you believe in your new love interest, give them a chance to prove your family wrong.